I think I'm finally ready to get back to my novel. My writer's block is diminishing as this pregnancy continues, and I'm getting sick and tired of feeling like a ineffectual lump. I've come up with every excuse it the book, when my excuse for everything else should
BE the book.
I think what's been holding me back is that familiar, stupid fear of failure. It's all well and good to say I'm leaving acting because I'm better at writing, but what if I'm NOT? I suspect I wasn't even a very good actress, and it took me over two decades to figure that one out. If it takes that long to discover my talents aren't literary either, I'll be fifty freakin' years old. And that will be depressing.
As scary as it would be to find out I suck at yet another artistic pursuit. wouldn't it be better to know that sooner rather than later? Maybe I could still go back to school and become a radiology tech. I think it would be a blast taking shots of people's fetuses all day. Or maybe a casting director. There's a lot of crushing people's dreams in both those professions, though.
Anyways...here's my new mantra: book before baby. Meaning by the time I give birth, I will need to have a completed manuscript. Just another reason to pray I don't go into early labor.
